And So Here's The End of the Semester

I can't believe how quickly the semester has gone by... before I know it, I'll be done with college! Okay, I'm not going to get ahead of myself. But looking back at this semester, I really feel as though no time has past between now and August 15th.

It's kind of like when you have a monumental birthday, when you turn 18 or something and you expect to feel extremely grown up and different, but you don't. That's kind of how I feel about this semester: I though I'd become completely different - more mature or something - but that hasn't happened. The only thing that has changed is that I feel closer to being older, closer to being my own adult and closer to what I could conceivably do with the rest of my life. Having said that, I bet my ideas will change at the end of next semester - that's just how I roll.

The best thing is that I went through this semester without having a stress attack which I am very happy for. That feels like a big thing, but I just realized I have a whole other semester to get through and then 3 more years. I won't get ahead of myself in that department.

What has been great about Explorations is that I have found it so applicable to all my other classes. I love it when you have moments where everything overlaps and just falls into place. I am glad I powered through Goffman and he seems to come up every other day in my life. Just yesterday (or possibly today) I was talking to Jena about changing identities. As an International Relations major, I love the idea of different identities and find it fascinating to see all these different walks of life. Starship Troopers, for me, was a great book for me to read at a time in my life where I seem to finally be able to "catagorize" myself in regards to how I see the world. I've always known I'm cynical, but I guess I never fully realized just how cynical my outlook on the human race is!

Especially with St Augustine and Antigone, Explorations sort of introduced a new style of thought to me. It's so much the contextual analysis of the work, but more has to do with the implications of what works say and how it can be applied to everything else around it. For example, when Antigone's want to bury her brother raised so many questions about what a burial actually means, and who it is for. Having read Antigone before, that is never something that we would have thought to discuss, glossing over it as an act of sisterly affection in order to ensure that her brother has the welcoming to the afterlife.

It has been a good semester - so far I have enjoyed all the newness of college and everything and am looking foreword to the next semester.

my community!

I've been thinking along time about this question...I've had this page up for over an hour and have walked away from it trying to wrap my head around it. I think the reason I'm having such a hard time with it is because when you ask "What community do you want to be in," what I interpret is "What do I want to do and be great at?".

My first thought was that I wanted to be ballet dancer at the Opera Garnier in Paris. I love ballet but was stupid and stopped dancing seriously when I was pretty young so now I am left with the reciprocal of what I had 10 years ago: the passion but no skill. And in order to dance at the level of the dancers at the Opera de Paris, you need to have been dancing 24/7 from age 2.... bit late now.

So I'm a bit lacking in terms of having the ability to enter this prestigious community but that is the reason I want to be part of this community. Ballet in its modern form has been around since before the French Revolution and is just such a graceful dance form, even if it does kill your body. If the actual Ballet hasn’t entranced you, look at the Opera Garnier. It is the most beautiful hall with so much history. It’s where The Phantom of the Opera supposedly resided! How can you not fall in love with the history and grandeur of the place, even more so the city? It is beautiful: the City of Lights. And this is where I stopped: I’m supposed to be writing about the community I want to join. It morphs from Ballet all the way to Paris...

The other reason I found it so hard to pick a community is because it’s my nature to want to try everything. I don’t like to be tied down into any one thing. I like to know that I can still experience a wide range of things without having to necessarily fully commit myself. I’m a bit of a nomad…you can’t really help but feel like that after a trans-Atlantic move. I want to go everywhere and not just stay in one community no matter how happy I feel there.

But yes, that would be a great community for me. There is even a chance that I could embrace my more nomadic side and get to travel the world as a “famous ballet dancer”! What a dream! Of course it’s a bit of a short lived community life; but two of the presentations we had today featured communities in which death was an imminent - for lack of a better term - thing. Jonestown and the Retirement community both sort of have death looming over them. Nothing lasts forever: no community last forever. But this is what I have chosen for the short time I could spend in it...in a parallel universe where my dancing is magnifique!

What I am Thankful For

Thanksgiving may have been and gone but I still have things for which I am thankful:

I just registered!! It feels good - though I just have to meet with my advisor to confirm everything... I am thankful for getting into the classes I wanted.

I am thankful that we are so close to the end of the semester! It has been crazy and amazing and we're 1/8th of the way through our college careers!

I am thankful that I was able to spend a lovely long weekend with my family (even though I sprained my ankle and bruised my knee, and not just like badly...they REALLY hurt! and look gross)

I went upstate NY to a State Park and realized at the last minute that this particular park was open for the hunting season! Bye bye State Park! I am thankful we realized that in time.

I am thankful that I will going home in 3 weeks to England, spending Christmas there for the first time in 5 years!

I hope everyone else had a wonderful break and are energized for the final push! I can't believe we are so close to the finish line!

One last thing I am thankful for is that we do not live in a world like that of Starship Troopers. Though a great books, there are other ways that citizens can gain more weight and perspective in regards to their vote. Actually to be honest, the whole becoming a citizen thing does resonate in me because I can't vote in the US and when I can in 5ish years time when I get citizenship, I will take my vote so seriously because it wasn't just expected of me, it was granted to me after what will have been 10 years in the US. Similarly, I was very aware of the power I held when I got to vote in the European Palimentary elections. I had to vote basically absentee so I felt that my vote kept me an active citizen of the UK.

I am thankful to be an adult and have a say in important issues…sometimes…

Reflection 11.21.2009

With thanksgiving fast approaching and the smell of turkey in the air, it is time for another reflection which will tie into the bonus question too:

When we went to the Native American Museum, I enjoyed seeing that culture. It is a very serene with their dependance on the land and their togetherness with nature. As much as it is a culture that is very private and one that I obviously don't belong to, I can't help but want to belong to it...it's seems so idealistic and simple.

Some people and me watched movie that was called "1000 different paths" or something. It documented the different lives and journeys of different native americans, both in the "modern" world and in their own tribes, showing how they live. There was a story of healer, a medicine man, who tried to cure a little boy, but unfortunately, the boy died. There was a business women living in the hustle and bustle of the city but still kept true to her roots.

The film was clearly meant to show how we are all human, just making our way through life, whatever cultural background we come from. There is a sense of othering, but I felt it was more the audience that was made to feel like an outsider, than the thousands of journeys taken by native americans. It made me wish I could be part of that culture...and the film was saying "ha! You can't!!" at the same time that it was celebrating the unique lives of these people.

The other thing that very much hit me was a small walkway into one of the exhibitions, that projected people along side you on either side ... it took me a while to work out what was going out. When I finally decided to read the caption, it said "You never know when you could be walking along side a native american", showing that they aren't this "other" people, they are integrated with every other culture despite the contradictory separation. The native american museum, is one of two more distinct cultural museums in DC that are on the Mall. The other is the Holocaust museum. (The African-American museum in Anacostia is obviously other one but it's not on the mall, and it's small and relatively unknown). It is interesting that at the same time the museum tries to celebrate the culture, but at the same time can't help but set it apart.

I enjoyed the museum overall and was sad that the food was so expensive - but it definitely did give me a new appreciation for the culture

War and Peace - abridged

"Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor, and the contrary opinion is wishful thinking at its worst. Breeds that forget this basic truth have always paid for it with their lives and freedom"

I'm really sorry for being pessimistic, but I do agree with this quote. I don't know when or why, but sometime in my 18 years, I realized that humans are not a inherently nice race. Granted, there are individuals who are good and make huge contributions to society, but when it comes to International relations and cooperation on a systemic level, I lean towards a realist perspective. How can I not when my entire continent's history has been defined by fall of empire after fall of empire and war after war? I can't even name all the wars that Europe has seen since the fall of the Roman Empire...too many. There are several things I want to talk about here, both to support and oppose the quote.

Firstly, violence has been a very big part of the world's culture since the dawn of time. It is man's natural tendency to be aggressive and defend his territory. From this aspect, I agree with the quote: war is a natural part of our world, however unfortunate that may be, but i think it is effective, especially in terms of defense. Focusing on some good wars, like we were talking about in class today, World War II certainly concluded with the majority of the Western World agreeing that "it was worth it". And to think about the consequences had we not fought or won WWII are horrible to think about. Everyone would be horribly oppressed and discriminated against.

To counter this, it is necessary to look at how war has actually made problems too. Even just looking at World War I, poor facilitation after the war ultimately lead to WWII... that certainly shows a case when war is maybe not the most permanent and final acts to secure peace. So it may have settled a specific dispute, but that doesn't mean that new ones haven't arisen and caused even more problems. Definitely, as the world develops more and more, there are actually some influential factors in the world that are not violent in any way. Looking back, there has been Ghandi and the Dalai Lama, neither of whom believe in violence as being the answer. These figures have also been able to get such a huge following internationally, which speaks to the fact that they aren't just two people trying to make a difference: they are making a difference. So violence isn't always the only answer, there are other ways in which problems and disputes can be solved especially in today's society where violence is continually becoming the last option in the minds of the public purely because of the damage it can do.

Which leads into the last part of the quote. Sometimes peoples are forced to violence because of oppressive governments and the likes. The hope for a better tomorrow, without violence, such as preached by Ghandi is not completely unreasonable, especially as I already said that society is moving in a direction of wanting more peace. Furthermore, even in times of war, people lose their freedoms and most definitely their lives. 9/11: the patriot act... complete loss of freedom as the government monitored people's every move. Then soldiers were sent to Iraq to defend the nation, and they lost their lives. During times of violence and war, people are just as likely to pay dearly as they are during times Mr Dubois may think of as blissful ignorance and peace, when nations are potentially vulnerable to threats.

When push comes to shove, sometimes violence is, though the last resort, the best method to keep and gain peace, but that doesn't mean a passive attitude and "wishful thinking" are any less importance or power. I'm on the fence. I understand what Mr Dubois is saying, he just needs to be less condescending and prehaps less pessimistic about society.

Reflections: 15th November 2009

I LOVE living in DC!!! At Arlington Cemetery, I saw the presidential motorcade not once but TWICE! how cool and amazing! Arlington Cemetery is a place I have been to many times before, and it felt especially fitting that it was rainy and wet when we visited there on Veteran's Day. We are celebrating fallen soldiers from so many different wars. I happened to walk by a Vietnam section and that was bizarre because their dates made the majority of them only a little bit older than me. And there are SO many graves there! More than that, I think there were at least three people in our class who knew or had a relation buried there. That's quite astonishing really and goes to show the grandeur of the entire thing and just how many people war affects.

In today's society - as we were talking about in class - we honor those who have fallen. It's not necessarily for any religious reasons, it's more so that the lives lived by the deceased person was not in vein. They are celebrated and "go out with a final bang" ..if you're lucky enough, that can literally be the case with military salutes.

Switching gears, I went home this weekend at it was so strange to come back ..both going to NYC and coming back to DC... they are both my alternate realities, both are so normal and have their routines. When I go to NYC, DC doesn't exist and vis versa. it's very strange. I wonder if everyone feels that way when they go home, or for some people do the two converge...neither is probably better than the other and in fact I like my two separate lives: one where I am independent (ish) and the other where i can get looked after and sort of be a kid, but still with all the plus sides of being 18! I don't know, it was very wierd to get on the train Friday and again today, and basically coming full circle twice. I came and went home twice. DC is my home. NJ is my home. Home is where the heart is?

Reflecting Time

Hmm let's see... what shall I reflect on this week?

It's so strange that we really like no have time left this semester, very wierd, though I am ready for some of my classes to finish and am excited to pick new ones. One huge difference between college and high school is that in college, the weeks go by super fast, whereas in high school they dragged on and on and on... even though looking back I can't believe it's been over a year since I submitted my first application.. And all these tour groups going round make it feel even wierder.

Last night, I went to the concert in the Tavern and it was awesome! The Rocket Summer is band I used to love so it very nostalgic to see them live, playing some of the songs I used to listen to when I was maybe 15. And I found a new band to like: Forever the Sickest Kids. In fact, the idea concert was the kind of music I used to be obsessed with back in the day! I would have killed to go to concerts like that when I was younger, but a) I didn't have much money and b) a lot of the concerts always ended up being 18 and over which was upsetting because there is no way I could have passed off as 18 ...and I still probably couldn't haha.

Anyway life is good and I got to see the Rocket Summer, Hanson, Matt and Kim play for free...thanks AU!!!

Wealth and Health

I think the health of a community can be measured pretty well by the wealth of it. If there is a lot of poverty, not only do you instinctually view the community as a "worse" community, but there is some quantitative reasoning behind that too. Firstly, wealth within a community yields a good economy and standard of living is automatically higher because there is more competition in the market and more availability of higher priced items. It naturally follows that then the house prices are higher, so the people living there tend to have a better income and aren't going to become robbers or steal anything.

In poorer neighbourhoods, there is much more want of things that tend to be lacking in a community, leading to more theft and an overall lower standard of living.

I despise that this is the reality of it, but it's true. Wealthier communities are healthier, moreover they are safer.

The question that stems from this question, is to do with how you interpret healthiness within a community. Is it literal health (obviously no), healthy relationships formed between members of the community? If it is this, then no, there is absolutely no indication of this type of health in relation to wealth. People can be bad or good, and that has no correlation to how much money they have: there are bad eggs in every the socioeconomic class.

If people have good relationships with each other, like neighbourhood watch programs, that's definitely a way in which the society is healthy.

Does healthy mean safety? That's how I interpreted it, indirectly. As I explained, having a good economy and wealth drives up the standard of living which allows people to live well.

I think that healthy as taken to mean safe makes a little more sense than my "healthy relationships speculation" just because you can have a very tightly nit neighbourhood that still is unsafe, just because of its surrounding area or people who infiltrate their little world.

As cyncial as all this sounds, you still got to remember, and I think Miranda at the least agrees with this too: it's supposed to be something we can draw knowledge from and apply it to our lives in order to make it better. Whether that eliminates looking at the health of a community or not is not the point; it's that we realize what we value in society to better know ourselves....

Sir Anthony Hopkins, serial killer!?

So last night me and a bunch of people were watching The Silence of the Lambs. It was the first time I had seen it and a really enjoyed it, I thought it was so interesting with just the psychology of it (despite the fact that I refused to look at some of the gorier bits).

At the end of the movie, I kept thinking about how strange it must be to portray a character like that...like you would have to be in such a different mind set as an actor while playing Dr Hector.

And the scariest thing to me was that being in such a mind set - and not being able to get out of it - was a major reason that Heath Ledger died.

No, I'm not one of those peoples obsessed with celebrity deaths, but there obviously needs to be a disclaimer on being an actor "Caution: May cause death if taken too seriously" or something. So I guess my question is: when you have put on the "front" of being a psycho serial killer, how easy is it to come back from that?

Anyway so that was what I got out of that movie - very interesting movie.

And Halloween!! everyone is dressing up in ways they would never normally think about dressing - what would Goffman think of that!!!

Happy Halloween to one and all!

p.s. depending on when your last final is there is only 42 days left of this semester!! and that's including holidays and weekends!! ahhhh

Live, Love, Laugh !!!

To quote Miley Cyrus "Life is What You Make It"

Personally - I think this is a little more upbeat than what the authors of Habits of the Heart think of life which brings the phrase "Caught between a rock and a hard place"... not exactly the way I want to live my life. I normally have a pretty pessimistic look on life, but there is a line between realizing that life won't be this utopian place where everything you want to happen does, and just essentially giving up because the present is crap and so is the past.

Okay well what about the future?! Nowhere is this quote to they say anything about the future. Only focusing on the past and, to an extent, the present isn't really the best way to live. Things may look bleak right now, but you can make them better, you just have to try.

It's like what we were saying about colleges in class today - for the most part we would have been happy anywhere as long as we had put effort into making ourselves happy. And it's true, it doesn't matter about what anyone else is doing - it's all on you and you have to accept that and do your best.

You learn from the past and grow: you tunnel through the rock!!!

The authors of this book need a little bit of optimism...you can't live such a cynical life.

I know society today isn't as amazing as it could be - but that doesn't mean we should give up all together and not hope that we can make the future better. We make our destinies "Life is what you make it" so make it as good as it can possibly be!

rain rain go away!

This weather is not too fun -- anywho. I very much enjoyed President Kerwin coming to talk to us. It really seems as though he cares about the fate of this school, and that is how you want a President to feel....and I previously had no idea about how much he had to improve the school's perception. Yes, his words may be diliberate, but I found him to seem genuine and personable.

I guess what the question is - when you put on a front, or are striving to uphold a certain status, is that still part of you?

And yes, of course it is. It's just a different side of you. With all these adults on campus, I'm having to be a little more careful with my manners and such - and that isn't changing who I am, it's just making sure I'm putting my best foot forward ... I'm doing my own part to uphold the expectations of attending University.

Very important side note....something NEEDS to be done about the heat in the building - I die daily 24/7 like I am right now... and the muggy weather outside...give me a break!

Anyway, all these parents on campus throw me off, with their inability to navigate TDR and the clogging of the shuttle ... perhaps if my own parents were here it wouldn't seem so annoying...I would just be another undergrad who's parents are visiting (and taking me out to yummy meals!)

I hope that everyone is having a wonderful parents weekend despite the weather

AU!!

Community... Everyone refers to AU as a community and we definitely are. Having said that, there are also smaller communities on campus, in addition to the fact that we are part of something much bigger than ourselves! (prepared to be blown away!!!)

We all have something in common: Going to/being employed by AU

What do we want to get out of that: Education in some way or another, or teaching and getting paid.

We can easily relate to anyone on this campus because we are UNITED by this campus and all the opportunities available to us here.

Furthermore, on campus, there are smaller communities such as...University College...aka us!

We specifically are a division of the larger AU community just by doing Wednesday Labs and living on the same floor and taking a COMMON class. We are the Exploring Community, sub set of the UC Community, sub set of AU

Want to zoom out further? We are all students, we are united by our common thirst and quest for knowledge.

Honestly, because of the self-interest idea we talked about in class (and I know perhaps not everyone agrees) but you can make anything a community, as long as people are together and acknowledge that fact.

Is AU a functioning community? Absolutely - of course every system has its floors but we openly accept ourselves into the AU community, which expands past current students and faculty to include all the alumni, benefactors and whoever else feels AU in some way contributed meaningfully to their lives.

The next question logically follows is what is so daunting about the world that at every chance we get we make these common bonds between people around us, or is it just human nature to ultimately "cling" for our own sense of comfort?

Nothing like being home

I'm home! It's wonderful! My doggies have grown! I ate steak!! (Keara be jealous) It is lovely. The beginning of this week was not so...with all my midtermy things I had to do, I felt kind of bad because I was pretty anti-social for a while in that I spent all my time in the library trying to conquer my work. That way I could come home and have a nice relaxing weekend with my friends and family.

On that note, I think I will address balancing in this post. I manage my work well I think...yes in my head I stress myself out...but not even about things that are due tomorrow or even in a weeks time from now. I worry bout graduating on time, I worry about getting all my requirements done. I worry about the long term things. Things that are completely out of my control. And I think that's why they worry me - because I have no control over them, not yet at least. I don't think people realize what a stress ball I am because it's not on a daily level - it's on a much larger level. I've always been like that, but now at least I know well enough how to cope with my compulsive need to be in control on a long term scale.

Does anyone else have those profound moments? I think everyone here does - I think us explorers are all quite introspective and that's awesome. But why are we so? Why can't we just be? Just exist?

I think I'm trying to be all deep and meaningful right now and it's not working but bare with me because I'm free writing and refuse to stop. Because free writes are ultimately my way of venting and just being in the moment - something I obviously have already stated I'm not amazing at. I'm always thinking through the next couple of steps - always planning for monday and what I'm going to do when I get back to AU...when I'm going to do assignments that aren't even due until next week. I'm a little crazy, I know.

I'm reflecting on myself because that was the most prominent thing in my life this week.

Have a wonderful long weekend!

No more advice!

Okay, so I have never ever been someone to like taking advice - or rather being told what to do. I am my own person. I don't need someone else to tell me how I should live. I'll make my own mistakes and do things my way thank you. Yes, I'll admit that sometimes I need technical advice, but I really am not enjoying all these people coming in and us just saying "what advice do you have?" NOOO don't tell me how I should go about doing things. I'm an explorer! I'll find things out on my own, thank you very much. I appreciate people like Hewitt coming into to talk to us, sharing what her life has been about, but I'm not going to take notes on what she thinks I should do. Similarly, people who are saying that they aren't "finding themselves" by reading about what other people have accomplished, or do....ever heard of a big picture? Similarly, didn't we say on one of the first day of classes that your OWN identity is formed and influenced by those around you!?

Sidenote, Obama = Nobel Peace Prize....?

Also, finding v. creating yourself.... it is necessary to do both. We have already taken the MBTI tests, and therefore know that some people are just more inclined to certain ways of thinking than others. That being said, you're not going to get anywhere if you stick to your MBTI results and never try new things, or take a challenge. There is no fight between these two schools of thought. They need to work harmoniously to actually be of consequence.

Overall, I just really need to stop hearing people giving me orders. It's killing me.

Apart from that.... I would just like to get through mid terms right now please and not think about major requirements and life long decisions. One day at a time. (and I'm such a hypocrite because I'm the worst when it comes to wanting to be prepared for what's ahead of me. But I try to just take it slow and accept that the only thing I can do to prepare for tomorrow is tackle what is in front me right now)

Excited for the Dalai Lama? =]

C'est l'heure pour une reflection

Je voudrais pratiquer mon français, donc je vais écrire cette poste en français et de nouveau en anglais pour les gens qui ne parlent pas le français…peut être vous allez apprendre un peu! Bien, j’ai eu un peu de surpris quand je suis trouvé mon type de personalité avec le “Meyer Briggs Test”. J’ai pris l’examen deux fois mais ils ont eu très cours et peut être incorrecte. Alors, je suis contente avec mon type qui est ISFP et la description, à mon avis, est plus ou moins vrai. Mais je ne sais pas que je devrai charpentier ou danser (mais j’adore danser). J’aime les points de personnalité que j’ai comme « vivre dans le moment » et que je suis loyale et fidele, et je suis accord avec ca, c’est très correcte. Je ne pense pas que on a confiance complète dans l’examen mais il nous donne une autre perspective valide.

I want to practice my french so I will write my post in French and again in English for people who don't speak french...maybe you will learn some! Well, I was a little surprise when I got the results of my personality type with the Meyer Briggs test. I have taken the test twice before but they were very short and may not have been completely accurate. However, I was happy with my type, which is ISFP et the description, I thought, is pretty much accurate...Though I don't think I will become a carpenter or a dancer (though I love to dance). I like the points about ISFP like "Live in the moment" and that I'm loyale and faithful, I agree with that fully. I don't think that we should completely trust the test but it gives us another valid perspective.

( I didn't write this bit in french ...just English now) so yeah I just always feel the I'm so in the middle with the personality tests, and just depends so much on the circumstances as to how I act...whether I'm loud or quiet. I suppose actually what was interesting the one of the charactersistics of ISFP was to be adaptable and flexible which like fits me soo well... I know through experience that I am extremely flexible with things so it seems to actually hold some weight. It's definitely something to take into account when I start looking at possible careers and jobs, but apart from that I'm still gonna trust myself over the test, and realize that I know myself better than any machine does =D

Real and the UNREAL

I happen to be writing a paper write now arguing the Tim O'Brien's The Things They Carried carries just as much, in fact more, weight than non-fictional accounts of the Vietnam War because it allows the reader to connect on a more personal level as the writer isn't just saying "This happened, then this happened.." it's much more...story like. And if a writer is good at what he does, then it shouldn't matter whether what he writes is based on his life experiences or not. Having said that, all authors add their personal experiences into their writing and I know that personally from my own fictional writing. It was, in fact, the best piece of advice I ever got from a teacher on the subject of writing: Write about what you know. And from the little I know about Ellison, he does shine through in The Invisible Man: the time era is the same, and therefore more importantly they must have had similar social experiences given the racial climate of that era.

So just because you find the two books on different shelves in Barnes and Noble, it doesn't mean I take either of them more or less seriously (going back to the "Expertise" discussion we had one day...) you take them at face value. At the end of the day, they are both stories to you, unless you are hiding something from us and are either Augustine or Ellison.............

and now I will go back to my essay in which I will in short expand upon my ideas here =]

Board of Trustees

Having the Board of Trustees in class was an experience, not necessarily good or bad. The wierd thing about it was that you could almost feel everyone putting on a front in a way: dressing neatly and such. What was a little awkward for me was that I had a feeling that the man trustee was a Vietnam vet... but only in between our discussion of the Vietnam memorial and his introduction. It made me feel just awkward about everything, because at some points we must have been bringing up things that were sensitive material to him and he even said that he knew people who never came back from Vietnam. I felt maybe I was being a little insensitive, especially because I raised the idea that the memorials do not necessarily need evoke emotion in order to be effective in commemorating the war.

I would have been a little more sensitive if I had thought about it...I was even telling my group how when I was at Union Station the other day, I was sitting next to a Vietnam veteran and the fiancee of a man who served in Iraq. They were comparing and constrasting their two experiences which was so interesting. The Vietnam veteran was saying that "the war never goes away - it's with me 24/7, 365". It was interesting to eavesdrop on their two stories.

Still - I was thought having the Trustees there brought an interesting perspective to the class and allowed us to see things on a different level with, in a sense, more adults in the room.

On a different note, this whole spiel with the war memorials (in addition to reading Tim O'Brien's book The Things They Carried, has ignited my interest in war again, if that makes any sense. In fact, my revelation just now (as I told Keara, Molly and Anna) was that I want one of my concentration areas in SIS to be Peace and Conflict Resolution!! haha! Good moment. I kind of already knew that, but I just made sense of why I wanted to do it. I've always had an interest in war and its causes and consequences and such...

So all in all - I've enjoyed my war themed classes this week and will continue to =]

p.s. Invisible Man is pretty disturbing - point of discussion for anyone who know's what I'm talking about, but also a disclaimer =]

My Life!

Do I want to live a life that is worthy of an autobiography? Rather than directly answering this, I will say that I want to live an exciting life that I can happily look back on in 60 years time and feel accomplished. I don't necessarily want to be famous or world renounced, I just want to live a life that makes me happy. It doesn't matter to me whether other people think my life is good or interesting or worthy of an autobiography. If I'm happy, I'm happy. Who cares what anyone else thinks?

As long as I'm able to reflect and look back on my life without feeling remorseful, I'll be happy. Even then, I want to have regrets because that's what makes you grow and learn. And other people might not think a book about regrets and learning isn't a good book to read. But for me, it's perfect.

Of course I have aspirations and hopes for how my life will turn out, but I'm remaining open about what will happen in my life. I just know that I can try my best to make myself happy and that's it.

I'll be pleasantly surprised if my life turns out and I am accomplished enough to document my life, but I don't expect it, nor will I be upset or feel unachieved if I don't have my autobiography on the shelves of Barnes and Nobles.

FIND HAPPINESS IN YOURSELF AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT ANYONE ELSE!!! =]

College College College

When Ms Humphrys came into talk to us on Friday I was not exactly blown away by what she had to say. To begin with, one of the very first slides she showed us was entitled "Me". For the duration of that slide, all that she could say were bits of advice for us as young college students; "Work hard, but not too hard"... apart from the fact that she went to college, I really can't say I learned anything about her. Okay, everyone has advice they want to give us especially at this time in our lives, but I was hoping she would talk more about herself than advice and statistics. I thought some of what she said was extremely obvious, and her saying it is not going to change the way any of us look at the opportunities we have right now and what we should do with them. I felt very lectured by her, like I wasn't doing enough to ensure my success in the future.

If I wanted to dig a little deeper, it was almost as though Debra Humphrys' talk paralleled Augustine's Confessions in that they were both talking about past regrets, although Humphrys went one step further trying to stop others from making the same mistakes she did, whereas Augustine basically just says "Everyone's human, c'est la vie". I understand she was just trying to point us in the right direction for the future, but at the same time, I would quite like to make my own way through life and make my own decisions and mistakes. I won't be swayed by statistics and Ms Humphrys' own life lessons!!!

I remember...I

Bear with me, this is quite the philosophical question:

Strategic remembrance: things we purposefully remember and bring to the front of the brain.
We humans have a tendancy to forget unpleasant things we have experienced and try our best to focus only what we like; memories we are fond of. This is applied to memories that carry emotion the memory (or what we think is a memory) of love, happiness, all that good stuff.

Thinking inately are applied to things that come naturally to us as humans; things without emotion: remembering how to walk, speaking etc.

I don't know enough about the brain to say whether this is a left/right side of the brain split so I'll look it up.............. okay so the left side of the brain is the mathematical side - in my theory - that would be the side where you remember things that are "human nature" and the right side, the creative side, contains all the emotional memories that we configure and transform to meet our expectations.

So is their a discrepancy? No, because you're using different sides of your brains. The two forms of memory are able to co-exist and are used in completely different situations.

(nb. I have a minimal psychology background therefore I could have either made an amazing discovery or pissed off anyone who has even taken Psych 101...